Sandi the Manscaping Expert

Every time I go out with Ms. Chick to an event I end up meeting very interesting people. And when I say “interesting” I mean quirky, odd, or downright bizarre.

Tonight we went to an event out of town. Good food and drinks, talked to some cool local guys. After about 20 minutes or so, this woman named Sandi* came over to our table and started yakking away. Turns out she was in town from a major metropolitan area on the East Coast, heard about this event, and decided to check it out. Fair enough.

Then while Ms. Chick is talking to someone else, Sandi reveals that she works in R&D for a manufacturer of men’s razors. (I won’t say the company but it’s a big one.)

“I really want my business card to say [brand name] Manscaping Expert, but my boss said no,” she tells me.

“What if you didn’t mention the brand?” I say. “You could just make up your own cards, then.”

“Right! That would work,” she says.

“So are there a lot of men who are shaving areas other than their faces?” I ask. As a writer and blogger, it’s important to ask the hard-hitting questions.

“Yes, actually,” says Sandi. “Forty percent of men shave their groin, 20% shave their chest and 10% shave their underarms.”

manscaping, men's razors, shaving, shaving chest, shave

This is not a BurmaShave ad. Photo courtesy Fauxbo.com

“Wow, really?” I say, thinking to myself, I know of one person who falls into two of those categories, but I don’t say this out loud. I am not that intoxicated. Then I wonder if Sandi has a big stash of men’s razors in her medicine cabinet, so that when a guy comes over for a little action she encourages him to shave his pits. Or perhaps his nads. And then she has him fill out a survey about the experience. This scenario amuses me so much that I lose track of what she’s saying. But it doesn’t matter – she’s now talking to some guy about finding a good place to eat near where she’s staying.

On the drive home, I tell Ms. Chick about Sandi’s occupation.

“No way!” she exclaims. “I call bullshit.”

“It seemed pretty real to me,” I say. “But if she was bullshitting me, she wins for the Best Pickup Line ever. Because those guys we were talking to were very interested in what she had to say about manscaping and men’s razors.”

“I can’t believe I missed that,” she says. “How much has actually changed with shaving, anyway?”

barber, barber shop, barber shop shave, shaving, men

Ahh, the good ol' days of straightedge shaves at the corner barbershop. Photo courtesy avoiceformen.com.

“Well, think about it. There were the days of straight razors and getting a shave at a barber shop, then shaving at home with a fancy razor and changing out straightedge blades. Then came disposable razors, then razors with two blades, then three, and now up to eleventy billion. Why do I need that many blades to shave my legs?”

Ms. Chick sighs. “Beats me. I don’t get it.”

I nod. “I bet Sandi the Manscaping Expert gets it.”

*name and locations changed

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