Moxie and the Mighty ‘Mo

Several years ago I wrote this post about being in need of a ‘mo, also known as a homosexual friend. Brief recap: I had been encouraged to find a ‘mo by someone I met at a college alumni gathering, the idea being that this ‘mo would impart wisdom and be there to support me when I’m having a meltdown at 3 a.m. I didn’t try all that hard to find one while living in SoCal, which may explain some of my poor choices in relationships and footwear.

Nearly 7 years later, I am very happy to report that I have found a ‘mo: my neighbor, Steve.* He moved in a few months ago along with his dog, Daisy*. I liked Steve the minute I met him, and the fact that we were able to have friendly, positive conversations right from the start – even when it had to do with Daisy’s barking (she’s since quieted down and has become a canine pal to me and my cats – well, Ippie, anyway) – was surely a good sign.

The more we talked the more I felt like Steve could be my ‘mo. We would have long text message conversations where we bitched about the Clydesdales, a.k.a. the women who live in the corner apartment and clomp by our apartments at all hours like it’s a runway and they are in heavy platform shoes. We talked about Steve’s decision to go vegan and I told him about a few locals I know who are big on the vegan scene. Lots of fun gossip, lots of potential bonding.

But I didn’t want to rush anything. “I think I have a ‘mo now,” I told Giles. “That’s awesome!” he said. I don’t know that he really understood my need for a ‘mo, but he is an empathetic kind of guy, so he says things like this.

Last weekend Steve & I went for coffee and I decided to pop the question.

“So, a long time ago I wrote this blog post about being in need of a ‘mo.” I started.

“What’s a ‘mo?” said Steve. I was concerned this did not bode well, but I pressed on.

“It’s a homosexual friend who will impart wisdom,” I said, quoting directly from the original post.

“I have never heard that term before,” said Steve.

“Apparently it’s a thing in SoCal.”

“Well, I’d be happy to be your ‘mo, but just to forewarn you, I am not the stereotypical homosexual.”

I jumped up and down. “That’s fine. You just need to impart wisdom. Can you do that?”

“I think so.”

Since then there’s been more gossiping, discussion about the hotness of actors in Magic Mike, the beauty of Matt Bomer, Sacramento life, and food. But my favorite conversation so far was talking a little about Tarot.

“What’s your favorite card?” said Steve.

“The Magician.” It’s all about manifestation and owning your power, so I dig it. “What’s yours?”

“The King of Pentacles.” Great choice – he’s all about practicality, wealth, stability.

I smiled. “I’d like a King of Pentacles.”

He laughed. “Girl, me too!”

Yeah, Steve is the best ‘mo ever.


Joe Manganiello (2nd from right), you can be my King of Pentacles anytime.

What I Learned about Life from Watching Movies, Part 1

This coming Saturday will mark my 4th year of blogging. Hard to believe I’ve been doing it this long, maybe because I’m sporadic in my postings. In honor of this anniversary I’m going to try extra hard to post something every day this week.

Cook And MooreImage details: Cook And Moore served by
I learned about manifestation and the power of intention from Bedazzled, the original 1967 starring Peter Cook and Dudley Moore. It was playing at a theatre in L.A. a few weeks ago and a good friend invited me to go see it, since I’d never seen the entire movie. About halfway through the film I realized that this movie was a great way to learn how to manifest, and how when we manifest from a place of ego, as Stanley Moon (Moore) does when he aligns himself with George Spiggott, a.k.a. the Devil (Cook), we’re ultimately dissatisfied with the results.

I learned about friendship and the importance of authenticity from Sex and the City: The Movie. (I don’t think I need to mention who stars in this flick.) Sure, there’s sex and nudity and titillating content. But at the heart of this movie is the message that friendship means you are authentic and honest without fear of judgment. Since this is still in the theatres, I don’t want to give anything away to those who haven’t seen it. Just know this, ladies: it may make you rethink the nature of your friendships with women, and if those friendships fully embrace your true self and honor the essence of others.

I learned about acceptance and compassion from Lars and the Real Girl, a very moving, funny film from 2007 starring Ryan Gosling as a troubled young man who falls in love with Bianca, a sex doll. His family and the community rally around him as he works out his extreme shyness and intimacy issues through his relationship with the outgoing yet disabled Bianca. Through the process they all learn a lesson on how important it is to be accepting of others, even when it’s hard to understand why they do the things they do, and loving them through their process of self-discovery.

For My Sister from Another Mister

It’s hard when your best friend is going through a rough time and you can’t physically be there to help them move through it. Right now T-Wizzle is in a lot of emotional pain, and it makes me wish I knew how to teleport or had a superfast invisible jet so we could go out for lattes and cocktails and karaoke, sit and cry together, or browse at Sephora.

I thought about what Beth did for her friend Renae a few months ago…how kind that was, and how several of Beth’s readers reached out with kind words to someone that they didn’t know, but whom they know is important to Beth. If you’ve been reading my blog for a while, then you know just how much T-Wizzle means to me. She’s truly my sister from another mister, and when she’s hurting I hurt too. I also want to punch people in the face if they mess with her, but that’s another issue.

Anyway, I’m posting this video clip from The Color Purple in her honor. She gave me this song as an MP3 ages ago, when I was going through a rough patch of my own, so I’m tossing it back at her to say I’m thinking of her and I am sending her all the moxie she needs at this time.

If you feel so inclined to leave some kind words for T-Wizzle in the comments, please do. I know she will appreciate it.